Happy 15th Birthday to the Blog!

I've been blogging for 15 freaking years. Can you believe it? I certainly cannot.

While I can't say that I'm a good blogger, or even a regular blogger, I can say that I'm enthusiastic about the concept of blogging. I like the idea that a blog represents. A modern day public diary - what a concept! Anyone else, anyone?

While I'm enticed by the idea that my thoughts and writings could live on well beyond me, I'm also loath to put my opinions on the internet for anyone to read. Especially since the opinions I've posted to this very blog in the past have proven - with the benefit of time and self-maturity - to be very very bad opinions. For example, just 2 years ago in January of 2020, I wrote that the Australian Wildfires would be a bigger story in 10 years than Coronavirus would. What a terrible projection!

In truth, my blog is more for me as a way to remember my own life, but I don't do a great job of posting things about my own life. In some ways the never ending coronavirus series is as close to a diary as I've done on the blog, and that was specifically the point as I immediately realized COVID would be a period of my life worth remembering in detail. So I wrote it down.

There are other things that are worthy of writing down and documenting for my future self to enjoy and reflect upon (and opinions to be disgusted by). I do think I should do a better job at putting those things on the blog.

15 years seems like the right time to also change the title of the Blog again. Against The Wind served me well in my younger bad boy days. But now I'm settled and I've come to the conclusion that my previous anti-wind opinion was wrong. I'm now pro-wind! So a new name it is.

Blogging in 3 Decades!

Hello blog readers!

It's my first post of 2020, which means this blog is now a teenager, and also means I've now been blogging across three decades!

So what's there to talk about so far in the year 2020? Donald Trump was impeached but will likely not be removed from office. We came pretty close to going to war with Iran. There is a deadly virus called the Coronavirus starting to spread across the world. The massive wildfires devastating Australia have been put out. Basketball great Kobe Bryant died in a helicopter accident yesterday. Billie Eilish and Lizzo took home plenty of awards at the Grammy's last night. Overall, not a great start to the new decade (with the exception of Lizzo winning awards). I say we check-in on these stories in 2030. 

Of all of them, the one we might be talking about the most in a decade, as a major turning point for world history, could be the climate change that brought about the wildfires in Australia. I suspect that this decade could bring about worse and worse natural disasters as a result of climate change. People may look back at those wildfires more than anything else and see them as the inflection point where climate change was truly perceived as a harbinger for more ruinous natural disasters.

With climate change in mind, I've recently grown more cognizant of the amount of waste I've personally been responsible for generating or that has been generated on my behalf. I've started taking some small steps to reduce the environmental impact I've had on the world. The tricky part is know what decision is best. Everyone knows disposable diapers are terrible for the environment, but what's the environmental impact of manufacturing reusable diapers and then the energy, soap and water it takes to clean them?

Other times it's hard to know if the scale of impact is even relevant. How many times would I have to chose to walk someplace instead of drive for it to counteract the carbon footprint of flying to Guam last week?

It's hard to know what is best sometimes, but other times it's pretty easy. I'm trying to avoid single use plastics whenever possible, and I no longer buy novelty things that I know are just going to end up in the trash in a week. I'm not sure the impact these changes will have, but I'm starting with the 'low-hanging fruit' as they say at work. I'd be willing to take some more drastic lifestyle changes if that's what is needed, but I'd want to know they will have a positive impact before I do.

I'm betting I find out in the next decade.

12 Years Behind the Keyboard

My last blogoversary post was in 2016 when this blog turned 9. I completely missed my 10th anniversary (and 11th).

Keen-eyed readers may have noticed an uptick in blogging output in 2018. 6 posts is the most production this blog has seen since 2014. About a year ago I decided to improve how I manage my life. I found an app where I can manage tasks and set up recurring reminders to help me remember to floss twice a week. One of those is to blog every 8 weeks. That's how you get to 6 posts in a year. Maybe I'll up it to every 6 weeks, but I'm not sure if my readers can handle that much content.

I think the key to blogging for 12 years is a combination of holding on to obsolete technology along with learning the dvorak keyboard layout. If you're going to pound out this many posts you might as well use a better keyboard layout than QWERTY. I know I've mentioned it in a few posts, but I've never officially blogged about it, since I learned to type on the dvorak keyboard layout about 6 months before starting the blog. Maybe that'll be a good post.

I feel like since I started the blog that people are much more wary about putting their personal information on the internet, especially facebook and other social media. I too share that concern, and have really reduced how much info I put on my social media. I realize how much not-so-great info I have on this blog about me, but my hope is that no one thinks to look for someone's blog anymore. But I'm trying to put less personal info out there on the blog, and at the same time trying to find interesting things to post about.

I am also well aware that some of the things that I blogged about in college would probably no longer be a good idea to post on the internet today. Maybe I'm more mature or maybe societal values have changed. I'm keeping these posts up, since I see the blog primarily as a diary to remind myself of how cool I used to be. Please ignore the ones that are now in poor taste.

Here's to blogging in poor taste in 2019!

The Dirty Thirty

Ol' man Russell here with another installment of my annual birthday post. It's been a good ride so far. Maybe time to look back at some accomplishments of the first 30 years of my existence.

In no particular order:

- Procreated

- Driven across the country

- Learned to ride a unicycle

- Built a chicken coop

- Drove a bus

- Graduated college

- Ate a spaghetti taco

- Watched all of The Wire

- Solved a Rubik's cube

- Sung a love song, like the way it's meant to be

- Shredded a Double Black Diamond (EXTREME)

- Went on the Price is Right with Bob Barker

- Slammed Poetry

- Fell in love

- Won a salsa contest

- BLOGGED FOR OVER A DECADE!

Alrighty now, enough of that.

In my first 30 years, I've also been a few places. Not probably as many as I would like, but I'm looking forward to going to some new spots soon.

Countries I've visited.

Counties I've visited.

OK. NOW THE MAIN ATTRACTION:

The annual chart of how many people wished me happy birthday. 

• The numbers: 36 facebook posts, 2 calls, 4 cards and 8 other electronic messages (texts slightly nudged out snapchats). Twitter remains a weak birthday message medium.
• My facebook posts are slowly declining. Maybe it's because I'm getting older and there are more facebook friends that I rarely interact with. But I did hope this would be a big year for me since I had a substantial birthday AND because it was on a Sunday which is a day that I assume people spend more time on facebook than other days of the week. Maybe in the future I'll track the day of the week as a data point.
• As promised a year ago, the feature you've all been waiting for is finally here. The facebook friend trend line. It's so scale-skewed! But I have the same number of facebook friends as last year.
• Speaking of facebook friends, I'm considering purging some of my friends. There are considerable numbers of facebook friends who I have no idea who they are, or why we became friends in the first place. I've been waiting until after this data pull to do it, but next year I might have 100 less friends. But I'm planning to not delete anyone who wishes me happy birthday to hopefully lose the dead weight and improve my ratio.  I recently did the same thing with my phone contacts. It was a sober reality that I'll likely never call/text the 20 girls I had crushes on in High School ever again.
• While my overall numbers have remained in the 50s, I'm pretty sure the number of people that actually wished my happy birthday is much lower. I had several people call or text and then also throw something on facebook just to get their stats in. Pathetic. It really calls into question the meticulous data I've been gathering.
• Ray = Total Fraudster. He's auto-happy birthdaying for sure. There's no doubt anymore. I'm not even going to mention him next year.
• It's the 5th annual "Happy Birthday Fartface" post. So that's still happening.
• No double Rachel Morgan this year again :(
• Going international. I got facebook posts from both Africa and Australia. I'm branching out worldwide!
• People often ask how to get mentioned in this post (Forno). There you go.

A late happy blog birthday

I missed the birthday of my blog once again. I always remember that it's in January, but I can never seem to remember the exact date. Anyways happy 8th birthday to the blog. I guess I never thought I would still be updating this thing 8 years later. In a way I barely am. But let's keep this thing limping along for another few years.

So let's get into the things that have become more important to me than blogging.

1) My job. I started my current job 54 weeks ago, and I really couldn't be happier. I love what I do, and the people I work for. Unfortunately it looks like my boss might get new orders (he's active duty), and his boss who is also great might retire in the next year or two. But for right now, my job rocks. Especially because I've been getting to travel more which I really enjoy. I just got back last week from Japan which was cool. Next week I'll be in DC and then in a few more weeks I'll be in Twentynine Palms, CA. It looks like this might be the year I take a run at mad Delta status.

2) My wedding. I'm getting married in June to a girl I met on FarmersOnly.Com. Just kidding it's to Carly. Planning a wedding is a lot of work. For Carly. So I've been trying to help out - she lets me lick the envelopes after she addresses them all. I do have real responsibilities, but mostly I follow the instructions of Carly.

This is where I clean dirty jeep parts

3) My house. I've done a lot to the house in the last 8 months, but it seems like there are always more projects to do. I've gotten some of the most urgent ones out of the way. Right before I left for Japan I put in a utility sink in the garage. That was a fun project because I got to use my new PVC cutters instead of a hacksaw. My next big project is building a The Cooper Howell Memorial Chicken Coop. I'm still miffed that Ann Arbor's chicken ordinance was so restrictive. Luckily San Diego has a pretty lax ordinance. Also egg prices in CA are up 30% due to the state requiring 119 square inches of space per bird. My birds will have 1,584 square inches. I might not build the coop until after the honeymoon.

Looking good in the hood

4) The Jeep. The Jeep has been keeping me busy - in a good way. Last month I started changing out all the fluids including the differentials, transmission and transfer case. Yesterday I fixed the engine temperature gauge and started work on the tachometer installation. I'm still working in my head what I'm going to do for a sound system. I love working on the jeep, and on the weekends I almost exclusively drive the Jeep because it is awesome and I love it.

5) The Cats. While no Mungojerrie and Rumpleteazer, the two Siamese cats we have are really growing on me. I had one in my lap today while doing my annual blog-year-in-review. The one cat likes to sit on my keyboard while I type and then sit on my chest while I sleep. It likes the warm.

So to summarize, I have a full and happy life with no need to use a blog as an emotional crutch or fill the major stints of boredom. But I guess the same could be said about me in 2007 when I started blogging. The beer, roommates, and schoolwork was just replaced by something more real life. But I'll keep trying to blog, not because you want me to, but because I want to.

WTTIF Gets Wood

Hello friends,

Long time no see. I've haven't been blogging at a incredible rate. But this post will have to be made as the official 5 year anniversary post. Which, for the record, is 5 days late. And I forgot to write one last year. Given the recent trend soon anniversary posts will constitute a large percentage of this blogs posts. Last year  I even blogged about how my lack of blogging has affected the number of birthday wall posts that I normally get. But that's not the reason I blog. As I laid out in my introductory post, this blog is to be used for the sole purpose of getting chicks.

But 5 years ago people were just figuring out how to dump things on this big truck we call an internet. Being a blogger was edgy and cool. Haven't any of you seen hackers? It was just like that. I was Dade "Zero Cool" Murphy and my readers were a sexier version of Angelina Jolie. But as the years dragged on I find that having a blog is considered passe. Blogs don't get chicks anymore. Today's babes only want guys with Tumblrs and over 100 twitter followers. I might as well be writing this on my LiveJournal while updating my MySpace.

Another problem with the blog is that content is harder to come by. It used to be that when I had no responsibilities I could go out and do stupid shit and then write (poorly) about it. But with a full-time professional job I have less time to spend doing stupid shit. And I refuse to let this blog divulge into me posting links to interesting things or write about my opinions on politics. There is enough of that on the internet already, thank you very much. And I'm not going to bore everyone by writing about my job.

The other real problem that has contributed to the demise of the blog has been the rise of Twitter. I've had a twitter account since March of 2009. It is interesting to note that it was also the last month that I also blogged more than 7 times. I think the twitters have taken away some of the low level content that once comprised the majority of the filler posts between the long posts. That basically leaves the blog for all the long-winded (boring) stuff like big trips. The problem is that no one wants to hear about other peoples trips unless there are pictures of naked people or you're leaving friends behind in Bloomington Indiana.

The good news is that I do have some posts that I plan on posting in the near future. You can consider this the preantepenultimate post of January 2012. Let's see where this year takes us, and let's pour some out for the last 5.

P.S. I'm really proud of what I did with the title of this post. Very high level stuff.

This amused me

Every once in awhile they send out these security newsletters at work. They are usually filled with stuff warning us about terrorists and shit. Whoever puts them together is either a 40 year old lady who wears Mickey Mouse shirts or a really high 17 year old sailor. Usually the last couple pages are filled with LOLcats, 90's clip art and random crap. I have no idea how they get sent out via official Navy Channels. The last page of the one they sent out today was simply this:

The image of a drowning sailor whose final thoughts before being consumed by the bosom of the ocean was someone blogging. Now consider all of the levels of irony that comprise this blog post.

You guys are awesome

It looks like my readership has been supporting the cause because I just received word that The Google is sending me another check in the mail for $100! This is great, because I really like money. I use it all the time. Last time this happened I asked my fledgling readership what I should do with it. So again, here are some options for what I should do with this money I really didn't do anything to earn.

1) Put it towards a new laptop for mobile blogging.
2) Bet it all on college football until I've turned the $100 into $1,000 dollars and then divide it among my readership. I think you each get $50.
3) Buy a gun.
4) Get really drunk and tell chicks that I'm an internet sensation. I'm not entirely sure how I use the $100 in this scenario.
5) Give it to charity. Ha!
6) Spend it on my novelty Michigan outfit, and take a picture of it and post it on this blog.

My last payment was October 2008. It took me 12 months to get my first payment but it took me 23 months after that to get my second payment. I'm guessing with my small but loyal following and an uptick in posting I will get my next payment in March of 2012. So in a mere 18 months expect me to ask this question again.

Brian Vastly Improves his Blog

I've added my Twitter feed to my blog. It is on the left information bar. It shows all of my Twits(?) Tweets(?) Twats(?). This now gives you a reason to check my blog everyday. These will be the humorous morsels that normally don't deserve a full blog post but still are awesome. I am excited about this, and you should be too.

WTTIF Turns Two

I've decided to start using the abbreviation WTTIF for my blog. Or just WTF.

It's the second birthday of my blog, which somewhat coincides with the new year.

After reading over the posts from 2008, I realize that I have a large amount to live up to in 2009. It should be a pretty exciting year. I am in my last semester and I'm only taking 14 credits, 3 of which are pass/fail and 2 of which are a first half-semester mini-course. I'm going to graduate and start a job, I hope. I expect to hit puberty sometime soon, which should be fun. Hopefully I'll actually take Alaska trip I've been vigorously planning. Maybe this will also be the year that I kick that crystal meth habit. I'll be moving out of this shithole, which is sad, but I will be moving into a new place somewhere. I should have some money from selling my Pogs and Benie Babies, so I will invest that into some infomercials, Snuggies it is! Some of my buddies are planning on proposing to their GF's, so I might have some weddings in the future to look forward to.

I've also started contributing to our fantastic house blog. I am going to stop posting on MB&QB because 3 blogs in enough for a kid with a 7th grade writing ability.

I don't work hard for my money

This is the week I get some of that internet money. Yes my friends, by the end of this week I should be holding a check from The Google for 102.06 dollars. When I got AdSense almost a year ago my goal was to have enough money in a year to buy a forty of Colt45. I underestimated my earning potential (you guys) by about 330%. The question is what should I do with my new found wealth. Since I really don't feel I have done anything to earn this money, I figure that I should spend it on something cool. I am open to idea's, but I have a few in mind.

Blogging party
This could be one of two things; a party for myself and fellow blog readers paid for by my blogging earnings, or it could be just a party that I liveblog during. Either way it would be a celebration of my blogging prowess, in which everyone would be required to read some of my posts aloud and discuss my pure blogging genius. But I really want to make use this money for more than a keg of Keystone Light.

Low risk long term retirement savings account
Um, yeah you know in like a long time this money will be worth more and then I can like, do things with the money I got from when I blogged during college. This sounds lame.

Fight Ann Arbor's unfair chicken ordinance
I don't know how much money it takes to fight city hall. Especially when my lawyer fee's are covered in my tuition. If I have any money left over though I can use it to file a permit, build, and care for Elwood Blues.

Rent a midget
I wonder how long you can get a midget for $102.

Put it into the AR-15 fund
I still haven't bought my assault rifle, mostly because they cost more monies than the intertubes provides. This could start the fund. The other reason I haven't bought one is that if I move to Chicago next year, I would have to get rid of it because of their Assault Weapons Ban.

Give it to charity
ha.

Build the zipline
I have always wanted to make a zipline from the third story of our house up the street to Bell's pizza. That way I wouldn't have to walk all the way downstairs to go to Bell's.

Become a day trader
I could get an E-Trade account, and become a day trader. Then I could get enough money to do everything listed above. Except give it to charity of course. I really don't know much about the stock market or investing, but I do have a Stocks application on my iPhone. If I make money then wooo! or else I can enjoy the financial crises like all other Americans.

Brian Starts a Third Blog

I've started a third blog. This blog isn't dedicated to me, or a man who scares the shit out of me, or even a fast food restaurant. This is a blog that details all of the hypothetical situations that I encounter. It is over at ultimatehypotheticals.blogspot.com

The idea is that people (including you) can contribute hypotheticals to the blog. You know, if you're in the car and you're wondering if it would be worse to be a midget or have elephantiasis this is the place to get some opinions. So if you want to contribute to the blog let me know and I will add you as a contributor. At the very least check it out and answer some of the questions that are raging in my head.

Life in Chi-Town

Sorry I haven't blogged in awhile I've been pretty busy. Actually that is a lie. I wrote one of the best story blogs I have ever written. It is at Tucker Max level. It's about going back to Ann Arbor and a wedding over last weekend. I would publish it but it's a little raunchy, and it is one of those things I would never want my kids or any girl to read. I have a few blogs that are really good but I just can't bring myself to publish them because they involve some nefarious acts, perhaps with readers of this blog. I guess I draw the line just below pooping in a box. And the point of this blog is to get chicks, not scare them away. So instead I'll share with you a little look into my life.

My life has fallen into a bit of a routine but I like it. I've been cooking for myself, which is something that I really can't do in the Box house. The best I could do at school was Michealinas, which were 10 for 10$ at Meijer. Michealinas has three levels of pricing which is; budget for 1$, regular for 1.50$ and gourmet for 2$. The thing is that some of the budget entrees are the best, and since they all cost the same at school I just got the ones I wanted. In Chicago however, they actually form to the pricing plan, and oh boy do I look poor when I buy the budget Michealinas and Wacky Mac (which btw has absolutely no branding on it). But just last week I made Chicken Parmigiana. It only took 4 ingredients but it was one of the best dinners I have made in a long time.

I have also been reading more. I didn't really read much between the ages of 12 and a month ago. I read a few books for high school classes but I missed out on a most of the great classics. I even took a class my second semester senior year called reading for enrichment, which was designed for kids who were planning on graduating and was "taught" my the drama teacher. I didn't really read anything unless you count The Multiple Man as a book (high school newspaper reference). I think I spent a week in that class reading a road map. Luckily my roommate has a great collection of books so I've been catching up on some good novels and autobiographies. I just finished reading some J.D. Salinger short stories, and while I did read Catcher in the Rye in high school, and as much I hear that I remind people of Holden Caulfield, I dislike every character Salinger has ever created. I think it stems from his overuse of the word "goddam".

I also try to watch a movie every night from my roommates 1000 disc collection. I'm finally watching all of those movies that you have always wanted to see, but never wanted to rent/admit it. I also watch at least one episode of South Park every night. I like to see the shows transition from plot based episodes to mainly pure social commentary.

On the weekends I usually wander around Chicago getting gay and seeing the city. I am going to try to make it up to the school where they filmed Breakfast Club and Ferris Bueller's Day Off. I also play beach volleyball once a week, go out with the other interns and "hang out" with Vickery's GF.

I have some better posts in the works, but in the mean time, WTF with the coinage comments? And thanks to everyone who wrote/texted/gchatted about taking office poops. It easies my work load to know that your easing your work load.

College OTR sucks my balls.

My freshmen year roommate would sit on our futon all day every Saturday and browse Facebook. He had one of two standard responses to everyone on Facebook.

1) This chick is hot. I'm going to facebook her.
or 2) He's in that frat? They're so gay.

Every time I read the blog College OTR I am reminded of his level of commentary.

If you've never heard of it, and I pray most of you haven't, College OTR (On The Record) is a college blog with contributors from schools around the nation. And it sucks. My issue isn't that there is a really crappy blog out in the internet. It's that people think that this blog is awesome, and give it awards (US News and World Report).

My first real complaint is the content. Along with what is noted above, the entire site screams look at me and look at these really cool people I'm hanging out with. Look how much fun I had. No one could have this much fun! it's like the Eleanor Roosevelt quote, "Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people." This site discusses people. Here are a few of the categories: Wacky Faculity; Campus Characters; and of course Hot People.

The most notable content on the site has been:
A) Coolest Frats + Sororities on Campus
B) Hottest Girls on Campus
C) Definition of a "Hook Up"
D) College Sex Diary

The entire site is fluff. Links to McLovin Videos?

Even the occasional post that would be considered news is lacking. Still no mention of Michigan Baseball post-season play. And the news they do get is usually late. I broke the Taco Bell story almost a month before it was posted on OTR. But I'm not trying to compare my blog with theirs. Their blog "is the country's premiere college blog, capturing the best of everything that happens at college." My blog is simply a shrine to my own awesomeness.

The idea is that a few contributors are selected to blog about events. The job description is this:

CollegeOTR Seeks the Next Generation of Campus Celebrities:

For the upcoming school year CollegeOTR is looking for a group of incredibly hooked-up scenesters to show the world what's happening at their school.

Submit your photos, gossip, breaking news – and anything salacious you can tell us about your campus.

We’ll select one Chief Contributor per campus and pay them $500 a semester for great work. CCs will be required to post 15-20 photos per week (with captions).

So these people get selected to be the voice of their school and write about gossip and shit. But why would anyone want to read what they have to say? Furthermore, who would want to become a Chief Contributor? That's like 100 hours of work for 500$ of pay. It's clear though that the people who do contribute are obviously the type of people that would think that is a good gig.

College OTR is like the trash TV of the internet. You read it not because it's informative or interesting. You read it because it's there and you have nothing better to do. Just blindly eat up whatever is given to you, and just convince yourself how great it is. It's the exact same reasons why I try to convince my grandmother to stop listing to Dr. Laura. I swear if that bitch wasn't given a platform everyone would realize how dumb she really is. But somewhere, someone decided that she is relevant, just like someone did for College OTR.

Brian starts another blog!

I have started a second blog dedicated to two of my favorite things.

You can check it out here.

I could probably add Ad's to it to generate some monies but you jerks don't click the ads on this site so its probably useless.

Enjoy!