How have I not been fired yet?

I have a relatively easy job. I drive a bus. I get paid 10$ an hour to drive people around Ann Arbor. I meet friendly people and get to listen to my Ipod. 

But to really understand my job you have to understand days like today. By not scheduling Friday classes I hoped I could devote an entire day to Mario Kart and Halo. But my boss decided that Fridays are also good days to work from 10 hours, from 8am to 6pm. Luckily I am scheduled to drive the PT bus which constists of driving the handicapped to and from class. Here is a timeline of my day. 7:57 - Catch bus to work 8:02 - Get to work, don't get yelled at for being late or disregarding the dress code 8:14 - Realize that my PT bus is nowhere to be found 8:30 - Get a ride to my bus which is north of north campus 8:40 - Pick up Caroline, who injured her knee playing club soccer. She is pretty cute, so I talk to her. She tells me she is living in 607 E. Hoover next year. I laugh. 9:00 - I come back to base and start a blog. 10:00 - I go to pick up Ruth who is has no reason to need paratranist, she can walk, but i guess she is just really lazy. Also she is a schizophrenic. No joke. 10:10 - I pick up Caroline again and drive her to the EECS building. Instead of dropping her off on the curb and having her hobble, I drive right onto the north campus diag and down the sidewalk. Like I said, she is cute. 10:25 - I get bored with work and go home to play Mario Kart. I don't tell my boss, and still get paid. 11:40 - My boss calls. She tells me I need to go pick up this girl. She has no clue that I'm at home. 12:00 - I go to pick up this girl. Her mom is there. Her mom goes to class with her. She is late, I don't talk to either of them. 12:40 - I get back to base and ask my boss if I can go home and eat lunch. She says I can. I am still getting paid. 2:10 - I come back to work. I drive some people around. I drive Ruth it the AATA bus station so she can get the bus to go to her car. SHE HAS A FUCKING CAR! WTF? Why does she take the AATA bus and the U of M Paratrinsit. Fucking buy a parking permit you crazy nut. 3:30 - I almost get hit by a freight train. 4:00 - My last pick up is a no show. I drive back to base and wait until 6:00 to go home. I type this and listen to my Ipod. I count that I only actually spent 2 hours driving people around. I think this is the easiest 100$ that you can make in a day. So while I hate working Fridays, I cant say no. And please don't forward this to my boss.