In about 6 months I will graduate college and supposedly become a productive member of the work force. This scares me. I really don't want to wake up everyday at 7 AM and go to a job for 8 hours. To avoid this I have be thinking of ways that I can still do whatever I want but not be forced to work 48 weeks a year.
This one is great because once I do it, I will never have to work again. All I need to do is hunt down Osama Bin Laden. It won't be easy, but if I can do it I will get $50 million from the State Department, $2 million from the pilots association and possibly $1 million from Bruce Willis. The best part is that I don't even have to capture him. All I need to do is give information that leads to his arrest or capture. I can already narrow the list down to a handful of probable countries. Then all I need to do is follow the insulin that he needs for his diabeetus. The insulin goes into a cave, I call the CIA, $53 million, drinks on me.
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
Saturday, November 15, 2008
The Ken Griffey Jr. Party
In mid May my roommate Brick started a quest to win the 1996 world series. Sweet Brick struggled through 162 complete games of Ken Griffey Jr. baseball over the course of the past 6 months and last Thursday he beat the Padres FTW. We made a bit of an event for the achievement.
We got a couple of kegs and all bought Value World out of baseball attire. The game started at 10pm and about 30 people showed up to cheer him on. We of course had to set up a PA system so we could do play by play and sing the National Anthem.
This is us singing the National Anthem with everyone facing the "TRUCKS" flag. We all sat on the couches behind brick and cheered him on. Brick, got out to an early lead due to his stacked roster:
Walker RF
Bonds LF
Piazza C
Griffey Jr. CF
Molitor 3B
Hansen 1B
Gwynn 2B
Jeter SS
E. Martinez DH
He scored 4 homers en route to a 6-2 win. When he got the final out all hell broke loose. 4 bottles of champagne were sprayed. There were high-fives everywhere and so much yelling. Someone put on "We Are the Champions" and we presented Brick with a trophy and put him on our shoulders and carried him around the house.
We then just partied all night, hard enough to get a noise violation. But not me because I had to work the next morning at 5:40.
We got a couple of kegs and all bought Value World out of baseball attire. The game started at 10pm and about 30 people showed up to cheer him on. We of course had to set up a PA system so we could do play by play and sing the National Anthem.
This is us singing the National Anthem with everyone facing the "TRUCKS" flag. We all sat on the couches behind brick and cheered him on. Brick, got out to an early lead due to his stacked roster:Walker RF
Bonds LF
Piazza C
Griffey Jr. CF
Molitor 3B
Hansen 1B
Gwynn 2B
Jeter SS
E. Martinez DH
He scored 4 homers en route to a 6-2 win. When he got the final out all hell broke loose. 4 bottles of champagne were sprayed. There were high-fives everywhere and so much yelling. Someone put on "We Are the Champions" and we presented Brick with a trophy and put him on our shoulders and carried him around the house.
We then just partied all night, hard enough to get a noise violation. But not me because I had to work the next morning at 5:40.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
Post College Plan 3
In about 6 months I will graduate college and supposedly become a productive member of the work force. This scares me. I really don't want to wake up everyday at 7 AM and go to a job for 8 hours. To avoid this I have be thinking of ways that I can still do whatever I want but not be forced to work 48 weeks a year.
This is by far my favorite and most feasible plan. It also involves the most work and risk.
I have talked for the past 2 years about opening a bar at the corner of State St. and Packard. I have told most of the people I know about what a great idea it is.
Most of the student population lives in the area south of Hill St. Yet the nearest bars are located up on State Street and South University Ave. For a students living at East U. and Greenwood they have to walk 2,200 feet to get to the closest bar (Charlie's). For a student living at Mary and Benjamin they are 3,500 feet away. There are lots of times when my friends and I want to go out to the bars, but convince ourselves not to because they are so far away. This gets even worse in the winter.
I've been to quite a few other schools. One thing I always notice is the quility of the bar scene. I think for a school of our size we should really have a couple more bars. My nights are usually spent between Charlie's and the Jug with occasional trips to the Blue Lep, BDubs, Mitch's and Rick's. When there is a 15 minute line at every bar on South U, I wish there were a few more bars.
Opening a bar at State and Packard would be ideal. It is in the heart of the off-campus housing population and at a big intersection. Also, it would be the perfect place to have a bar on football gamedays and hockey nights. There isn't a single bar within a half mile of Yost.
When I first started thinking about it, my tentative plan was to move into the vacant Saki Bombs. But then Get Your Game On moved in. But in another turn of event the proprietors of Atlanta Bread Company decided they did not like making money and turned their store into Artisan Organic Bistro. They are open about 4 hours a day and I am taking bets on weather it or Get Your Game On will close first. I heard that the Organic Bistro isn't supposed to make it past the end of the year. Artisan Organic Bistro is nearly ready to be a bar. It has an open layout and with a couple of TV's it could be a bar as is, even though I would definitely make some changes.
My only fear is that I could become that creepy old dude that still thinks he is in college. I saw Mitch of Mitch's Place in an alley behind a dumpster smoking cigarettes. He is like 40 years old now. But then again I see BTB Adam at the bank all the time and he seems to be making lots of money. I bet owning a bar isn't as glamorous as it seems. You probably have to do a lot of work, but you would be soooo drunk all of the time it wouldn't matter. I've seen It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, that looks like fun. I hear the hours kinda suck, but as long as I'm not doing Charlie work I think I'll be fine.
I have a few names in mind. The Narwhal is the current leader.
This is by far my favorite and most feasible plan. It also involves the most work and risk.
I have talked for the past 2 years about opening a bar at the corner of State St. and Packard. I have told most of the people I know about what a great idea it is.
Most of the student population lives in the area south of Hill St. Yet the nearest bars are located up on State Street and South University Ave. For a students living at East U. and Greenwood they have to walk 2,200 feet to get to the closest bar (Charlie's). For a student living at Mary and Benjamin they are 3,500 feet away. There are lots of times when my friends and I want to go out to the bars, but convince ourselves not to because they are so far away. This gets even worse in the winter.
I've been to quite a few other schools. One thing I always notice is the quility of the bar scene. I think for a school of our size we should really have a couple more bars. My nights are usually spent between Charlie's and the Jug with occasional trips to the Blue Lep, BDubs, Mitch's and Rick's. When there is a 15 minute line at every bar on South U, I wish there were a few more bars.
Opening a bar at State and Packard would be ideal. It is in the heart of the off-campus housing population and at a big intersection. Also, it would be the perfect place to have a bar on football gamedays and hockey nights. There isn't a single bar within a half mile of Yost.
When I first started thinking about it, my tentative plan was to move into the vacant Saki Bombs. But then Get Your Game On moved in. But in another turn of event the proprietors of Atlanta Bread Company decided they did not like making money and turned their store into Artisan Organic Bistro. They are open about 4 hours a day and I am taking bets on weather it or Get Your Game On will close first. I heard that the Organic Bistro isn't supposed to make it past the end of the year. Artisan Organic Bistro is nearly ready to be a bar. It has an open layout and with a couple of TV's it could be a bar as is, even though I would definitely make some changes.
My only fear is that I could become that creepy old dude that still thinks he is in college. I saw Mitch of Mitch's Place in an alley behind a dumpster smoking cigarettes. He is like 40 years old now. But then again I see BTB Adam at the bank all the time and he seems to be making lots of money. I bet owning a bar isn't as glamorous as it seems. You probably have to do a lot of work, but you would be soooo drunk all of the time it wouldn't matter. I've seen It's Always Sunny In Philadelphia, that looks like fun. I hear the hours kinda suck, but as long as I'm not doing Charlie work I think I'll be fine.
I have a few names in mind. The Narwhal is the current leader.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Post College Plan 2
In about 6 months I will graduate college and supposedly become a productive member of the work force. This scares me. I really don't want to wake up everyday at 7 AM and go to a job for 8 hours. To avoid this I have be thinking of ways that I can still do whatever I want but not be forced to work 48 weeks a year.
I am already planning a trip to Alaska to prospect gold. So my second post college plan involves me striking it rich in the gold fields. Lets say I stumble upon the motherlode (that's a golden pun (ohh that's rich)) I then can really do nothing all year. My work would involved going camping for a few weeks a year and just collecting more money from the ground. I figure that I would only need to gather 7 or 8 pounds of gold a year to make just as much or more money than I would working a full time job. Sounds pretty easy to me.
I am already planning a trip to Alaska to prospect gold. So my second post college plan involves me striking it rich in the gold fields. Lets say I stumble upon the motherlode (that's a golden pun (ohh that's rich)) I then can really do nothing all year. My work would involved going camping for a few weeks a year and just collecting more money from the ground. I figure that I would only need to gather 7 or 8 pounds of gold a year to make just as much or more money than I would working a full time job. Sounds pretty easy to me.
Sunday, November 9, 2008
Post College Plan 1
In about 6 months I will graduate college and supposedly become a productive member of the work force. This scares me. I really don't want to wake up everyday at 7 AM and go to a job for 8 hours. To avoid this I have be thinking of ways that I can still do whatever I want but not be forced to work 48 weeks a year.
My initial idea is to make a fortune on the internet. But how do you make all those internet monies? It's not by selling other peoples shit on eBay. I think I could start a pretty successful website. The trick is catering to your audience. Through my experiences I have found that the most peaceful thing in the world is a fat Asian kid napping. For some reason when an overweight Asian kid is catching some Zzz's it just puts my mind at ease. I bet there are others out there who also find it very peaceful. So I want to start NapTube. It's just like YouTube, but instead of crying teenage girls it's just streaming video of heavyset Asian kids napping. I'll leave it as NapTube just in case I want to expand to skinny albino adults napping in the future. Hey it worked for those people over at CryingWhileEating.com
My initial idea is to make a fortune on the internet. But how do you make all those internet monies? It's not by selling other peoples shit on eBay. I think I could start a pretty successful website. The trick is catering to your audience. Through my experiences I have found that the most peaceful thing in the world is a fat Asian kid napping. For some reason when an overweight Asian kid is catching some Zzz's it just puts my mind at ease. I bet there are others out there who also find it very peaceful. So I want to start NapTube. It's just like YouTube, but instead of crying teenage girls it's just streaming video of heavyset Asian kids napping. I'll leave it as NapTube just in case I want to expand to skinny albino adults napping in the future. Hey it worked for those people over at CryingWhileEating.com
Monday, November 3, 2008
Don't Vote
The last presidential election was during my senior year of High School. I didn't vote, and here is why.
http://www-personal.umich.edu/~bcruss/dark%20side%20of%20voting.jpg
Also, I was only 17 years old.
http://www-personal.umich.edu/~bcruss/dark%20side%20of%20voting.jpg
Also, I was only 17 years old.
Sunday, November 2, 2008
What I would bequeath the University of Michigan
It appears from the amount of plaques around campus that each graduating class gives a gift to the school. I have no idea who gets to decide what we give the school, or how our class pays for it. I have an idea for a class gift but I have no one to present it to. The only person I know in MSA is dating the guy who made fun of me in front of the Ann Arbor City Council. So I guess I'll tell you my idea and hope that the Director of University Giving is an avid blog reader.
The class of 1870 purchased a statue of Benjamin Franklin and gave it to the University. The statue stood just north of University Hall, where Angell Hall stands today. Here is a picture:
Unfortunately the Class of 1870 had thought they had purchased a bronze statue but in fact it was made of Pewter. Student would regularly paint his trousers and jacket maize and blue. The statue stood there for the next 29 years. In 1899 a student wedged a beer bottle in to Mr. Franklin's pocket. To prevent further deterioration the University decided to drill a hole in his head and fill him with cement. Of course as any material science major could tell you, cement filled pewter + winter = deterioration. The greatest American didn't make it to see his 30th birthday.
So I think it would be prudent of our class to re-give a statue of Benjamin Franklin and restore his place on our fine campus.
The class of 1870 purchased a statue of Benjamin Franklin and gave it to the University. The statue stood just north of University Hall, where Angell Hall stands today. Here is a picture:
Unfortunately the Class of 1870 had thought they had purchased a bronze statue but in fact it was made of Pewter. Student would regularly paint his trousers and jacket maize and blue. The statue stood there for the next 29 years. In 1899 a student wedged a beer bottle in to Mr. Franklin's pocket. To prevent further deterioration the University decided to drill a hole in his head and fill him with cement. Of course as any material science major could tell you, cement filled pewter + winter = deterioration. The greatest American didn't make it to see his 30th birthday.So I think it would be prudent of our class to re-give a statue of Benjamin Franklin and restore his place on our fine campus.
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